Danville Enlightener

VOL. VIII, No. 33

September 9, 2007

Profiles of Encouragement

“There are two types of people . . .” Ever heard someone begin a sentence this way? An uncle of mine, no matter the situation, always explained it with “There are two types of people, those who can and those who can’t,” he might say to me when I told him I couldn’t do something he asked. “There are two types of people, those prepared and those who are not,” he would say upon learning that I had not done well on a test.

This was probably Uncle Jack’s version of “There are two types of people, those who build airplanes and those who build parachutes,” in discussing optimists and pessimists. You’ve heard at least a rendering of this I am sure. “There are two types of people, those who see the glass as half full and those who see it as half empty.”

This “two types of people” certainly isn’t limited to optimists and pessimists. I have found that in the church, “There are two types of people, encouragers and discouragers.”  Those who encourage are always doing what can be done to build up, bind up and strengthen the hearts, souls and emotions of believers. Discouragers, on the other hand, dispirits, tears down and destroys with little or no consideration.

Every believer can become an encourager, if that is what we desire to become. As brothers and sisters in Christ we “should have the same care for one another,” (1 Cor 12:25).  Also, we should “with all lowliness and gentleness, with longsuffering, bearing with one another in love,” (Eph 4:2). “Bearing” translates a word meaning “to endure” or “put up with.”  Therefore, we are told to put up with those who need us, those who may not want us and with those who might even be unkind, unloving or uncaring toward us. In a word this means we are to become encouragers to those who need building up regardless of their disposition, worth or response.

Actually being an encourager is not an option. I haven’t been granted the liberty to become  moody  and  unresponsive  to  my  brothers and sisters. We have all witnessed 

those who might be jovial, friendly and encouraging one day but then on the next day they might be dismal, distant and discouraging. We can do better!

Some say, “I would really like to be an encourager, bit I don’t know how.” This is not an excuse because Paul gives us a quick profile in encouragement in 1 Thess 2:7-11. Let’s learn how we too can become an avenue of encouragement to others.

GENTLE ON MY MIND: “But we were gentle among you, just as a nursing mother cherishes her own children,” (Vs 7). Behaving toward others with tenderness can soften the most ridged (Prov 15:1). While we must always rebuke sin and even the sinner, we must do so with gentleness (Gal 6:1). I must ask myself, “Am I gentle when I approach another? Or, do I come across harsh and caustic?”

GIVING MYSELF: “So, affectionately longing for you, we were well pleased to impart to you not only the gospel of God, but also our own lives, because you had become dear to us,” (Vs 8).  Being a Christian and a hermit is mutually exclusive; we must interact with others. We must invest in the lives and in the struggles of other Christians. We must know their needs. We are told to bear the burdens of others (Gal 6:2). This cannot be done if we ignore people. Sadly, many professed Christians ignore the struggles of others but then complain when those believers are overtaken in faults. Devote some time to be with members here and learn of their battles. Then offer to pray for and help bear them up while they fight.

KEEP THE MOTIVE PURE: “For you remember, brethren, our labor and toil; for laboring night and day, that we might not be a burden to any of you, we preached to you the gospel of God” (Vs 9). Paul reminded them of WHY he worked while among them. Some had accused him of impure motives, but he could point to his life and prove his sincerity. Regardless of what we do our motives must be pure. If my kindness or my gift or my words have been given with pure motives, then I’ll never become offended when others do not treat me in the same way. Pure motives means my actions are unconditional.

ALWAYS BE CONSISTANT: “You are witnesses, and God also, how devoutly and justly and blamelessly we behaved ourselves among you who believe” (Vs 10). This was not a cliché with Paul because he always practiced what he believed and preached. Discouragement always results when inconsistency (hypocrisy) is observed in our lives. But if we put into practice what we claim to believe, then that consistency serves to encourage others. If we claim to love the Prince of Peace, but strive for discord, this discourages. On the other hand, if we pursue peace, we show consistency and people will be encouraged by us.

SPEAK WORDS OF ENCOURAGEMENT: “As  you  know how we exhorted, and comforted, and charged every one of you, as a father does his own children” (Vs 11). It is a miserable parent indeed that provokes his children with harsh, unkind and disheartening words. Fathers are to lift up and build up children, not tear them down (Eph 6:4); this is Paul’s reference point. Elsewhere Paul reminded these Christians to “Therefore comfort one another with these words,” (1 Thess 4:18). Nothing can take the place of saying an encouraging word.

A phone call, a visit, a card or a letter will lift up a discouraged brother or sister. The Proverbs are filled with the wisdom of an encouraging word. “Pleasant words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the bones,” (Prov 16:24). “A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver,” (Prov 25:11). Just remind the hurting, “I’m praying for you.”  Or tell the struggling, “I believe in you.” Or let those who are weak know, “You can do better.”

-- jrb

"As I See It"

“And he would gladly have filled his stomach with the pods that the swine ate, and no one gave him anything,” (Lk 15:16). The prodigal son had left home, spent all his money and was now basically living as a homeless man. He had become a beggar depending on the handouts of others for his food. He had, no doubt, become a pitiful display of a man and sympathy would have prompted many to give to him.

Often when I would read about this young man I would marvel at his change of heart. He crawled out of his squalor and returned home. He confessed his sin and asked his father if he could just work in his barns. His father, on the other hand, would have none of that, he welcomed his son back into the family (Lk 15:22-24). The question remains, however, what caused such a change of heart in this son?

Most conclude that it was when he found himself as low as one could go. There are fewer jobs less desirable than living and working in a pig’s sty. I concur that he was about as low as one could go, but I do not believe that is solely responsible for his change of heart. Living in filth and depravity does not automatically spawn desires to “clean up” one’s act.

The final sentence before “he came to himself,” (Lk 15:17) is “and no one gave him anything.” There is a direct correlation between no one giving to him and him coming to himself. So long as he received handouts he would have remained in the far country. A hand out is not necessarily a helping hand. He needed to learn to accept responsibility and stand on his own two feet, and when forced to do so he came to himself and returned home.

Do you want your daughter to do better in school? Stop giving her excuses; “I know the teacher don’t like her.” Do you want your husband to be a better provider? Stop pampering his pettiness. “His boss is out to get him.” Just as sure as we would not give a bottle to an alcoholic, we should never offer to become an enabler for another.

“Oh, the poor boy, he is so hungry let me give him some food.” If this had been said and done, he might never have returned home. “It’s OK Billy; you don’t have to get your Bible lesson, because it is too hard.” The chances are “Billy” never will become a good Bible student because Mom enables his slothfulness.

AS I SEE IT, often the best help one can receive is no help at all. “Quit your crying, get up and stand on your own two feet. Stop hiding behind your fears and grievances.”